Sunday, October 16, 2005

Vac-Ay Day 6 Review: Culture Crunch

So sure this happened eight days ago but it is the final chronicle in my vacation. What better way to spend a rainy day then to watch college football and interupt the one person reading every fifteen minutes so that no one can achieve anything all day.

Once night fell, we went out for a Spanish play. Yikes, my Spanish has slipped moreso than I hoped. It was a love story about how we refuse the people in our lives since they are not our ideal prototype. That moment was full of irony since well I can never seem to decide on someone being a long term romantic possibility. I found the theme to be summed up in words that may come easier to most of us than saying I love you... your flaws are tolerable.

We caught up with friends for one final debacle of debatchory. This place in the AM screems of college mentality where all pack in to watch sports and drink specials when the lights go on. I bought my first round of lunch boxes since leaving Wisconsin. D.C. Prices are much higher than the cow tiping capital but oh well. When I chug that drink it magically takes me to a dive where some fraternal/sorority formal took place.

The spectator sport of the night was watching an older - and I mean much older woman trying to play on a younger guy. I am all in favor of the sugar momma. Something about their ability to spend their husband's pension on me that is a very attractive. This woman put her hand on the seat for a good 15 minutes while boy'o went to the potty. There came a point in the night that I was on the verge of stepping behind her and saying "come on mom! Dad only died six months ago!"

My bar assesment of DC women is that it is a priority that they are seen as smart sexy more than fun sexy. Whereas in the midwest there is a bout for wholesome sexy and classy sexy. It is impossible to live in DC and not be smart. If you are an idiot and living in DC you clearly are a tourist. The IQ of the homeless people in DC I am sure could out smart most homeless people. That is something that Alec Tribec should focus as the next Jeopardy promotion- Homeless Week. Come see which city has the bums that with a nights stay at the HOJO, a clean shave and a toothbrush could very well be your boss.

I was able to catch up with Paul again before I left. We went to some house party where he with held valuable info- they were cashed of all things alcoholic. I was at the point where I needed to go home; I started smoking. This display is to only confirm my obsession with abrupt mortality. That and I love the pain it causes for days after even though I never inhale.

Alas, we went on to another bar, why? It is the farewell tour of one group of hodgepodge folks in a land of ideals and restrictions. Whoa! tangent - back on track. So we went to this place that fired me up for a number of reasons. 1. They told me I could not wear my hat back words. I then turned it around. 2. Another person then told me I could not wear a baseball hat there. 3. The person we were meeting up with was sweating one of my friends that I came with, and am definitely attracted to. 4. I knew I was too drunk and fired up so I held off from drinking or even saying a word. (for me to stay silent something is wrong) 5. Leaving the bar some chump was wearing a hat in there.

DC is full of politics but somehow still gets away with calling them parties. Right on, everyone wants to f eachother, whether literally or professionally is the only question.

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